thumbnail_piccollage

Who likes my new website?! Thanks as always must go to Robert!

Who likes my fancy collages? I am obsessed. I used to hate taking photos of myself and would always try to be sitting down or hiding my stomach and thighs behind a child. Now, I look at my endless selfies and feel proud. I don’t share them all. I’m not a Kardashian, but the photos I take are a useful form of documentation more than anything else; a reminder to myself of how far I have come, and how far I still have to go.

Of course, selfies, photos, mirrors are all great at showing the physical results of our endeavours, but they don’t show the iron will that is gradually being carved out within.

On Tuesday, I went for a run. 5km, as usual, but I didn’t exactly love it. It was raining, for a start, but also I wasn’t in the right head space to keep pushing through. I stopped halfway and walked for a couple of minutes, and then I was so angry at myself for doing that, that I spent the rest of the day silently sulking about it. If I can’t run 5km without stopping, then how can I hope to run 10km?

I don’t like to be outdone.

Today, I ran again.

thumbnail_piccollage

The 10K I will be running on December 11th is mostly on sand, and at that time of year it’s likely to be wet and soggy. How lucky (?!) that these were the conditions that I found myself in today. Setting off along the beach, there was a brutal wind in my face and my feet were almost sinking into the wet sand. After just a couple of minutes, my thighs were complaining about the effort. Bless them, my thighs prefer to be fat, wobbly, and lazy. I do not. I also found it hard to breathe deeply enough with the wind whipping at my face, but I pushed through, determined to carry on.

At the end of the beach came concrete. Beautiful, blessed, hard grey concrete. Hurrah!

Getting out of the wind energised me and suddenly I found the grit and determination I needed to run further than I have done so far. 6.59km, to be exact, or 4.09 miles. I achieved this in 44 minutes, which I was pretty pleased with considering the conditions for the first 18 minutes of the run.

I can do this, and I will do this.

Slowly but surely I will find it within myself to go further, push harder, and run faster.

My aim is to finish the race in December in under an hour. Frankly, I don’t care if it’s 59 minutes and 59 seconds, but I know that if I go over that hour I’ll be incredibly angry at myself and will probably spend the next 18 months eating my feelings.

So, as my fantastic water bottle from Hydrate M8 says: Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger.

I can and I will.

thumbnail_img_0343

p.s- Hydrate M8 don’t pay me to endorse their products, I just really love my water bottle!

p.p.s- My collage obsession is in full flow over on my Instagram page!